Podcasts

When we attempt to fix, rescue, protect and buffer others from the negative consequences of their own lives, we’re not helping. In fact, we may very well be making things worse. We’re definitely making things worse for *ourselves* by draining our energy supply so we don’t have anything left for ourselves. I talk through a…

Setting boundaries can be difficult, esp. when we first start. The guilt and shame we feel when setting boundaries can be paralyzing. Bookending with a safe, supportive other person when you’re setting boundaries can help you deal with those difficult emotions. It can also help you hold yourself accountable to following through on setting the…

Barb’s guest Hope shares her experience, strength and hope on this episode. Hope shares about her #YOLO philosophy, which is very different than her YOLO philosophy of her younger years! Now it’s about trying new things that you’ve always wanted to try, trying things that will stretch, grow and change you. When she was young,…

Two stories about garbage cans are profiled to show how our thinking becomes much less rigid as we continue our journey of recovery. These stories also illustrate how recovery shows us how frequently we put up with things that annoy the f**k out of us when we don’t have to. We GET TO have choices…

SHOW NOTES If you’re sick and tired of the endless string of negative thoughts and self-judgment in your head, that can end! I’m living proof! It starts with awareness – awareness of what you’re saying to yourself. You then need to analyze what those messages are and what they’re doing to do you. They’re crippling…

SHOW NOTES When we’re focus on what we DON’T want we tend to get it, so focus on what you DO want instead. SHOW NOTES When we’re focused more on what others think of us, and things we DON’T want, we’re more likely to get it. However, when we start to focus on ourselves and…

SHOW NOTES The only way to change the way others interact with you is to change the way YOU interact with THEM! You can’t change other people, but you *can* change your ways! When you start being honest with people about what you really want, need, think and feel, when you lower your expectations of…

SHOW NOTES Codependent people are focused outside themselves and care what others think about them. As you’re recovering from your codependent ways, you can leverage that tendency for your own good by using it with some kind of an accountability partner. In the beginning, you can use that desire to NOT let them down by…

SHOW NOTES Here’s a story of a variety of ways that recovery has shown up in my everyday life. It features a story from a day at the beach where I sat next to two people who were bitching and complaining. In the past, I would sat there and stewed and fumed and blamed them…

SHOW NOTES If you set a boundary with someone and they don’t honor, you have to do something about them not honoring it. “Doing something” is called a consequence. If you don’t do anything when someone doesn’t honor your boundary, then it wasn’t really a boundary, it was just a wish. Learn how to set…