Fragmented to Whole

Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

This podcast can help you go from fragmented to whole. The title of the podcast comes from my journey of recovery in 12 step programs where I came in feeling fragmented and now I AM WHOLE. I talk about how that happened, and many of the lessons I've learned in recovery. I cover such topics as learning acceptance, overcoming unrealistic expectations, intimacy, forgiveness and boundaries.

All episodes are 20 minutes or less, most are less than 15. The first episode is my story in brief so you'll hear about the kind of profound life changes that I experienced in 12-step recovery. Other episodes cover specific topics such as Acceptance, Victim Mentality, Overcoming Negative Thought Loops, etc. You don't have to be in recovery to benefit from it though!

One last (very important) thing. I don't speak for or endorse any particular 12 step program of recovery. Though I'm a huge fan of 12 step recovery, and a member of two 12 step fellowships, I cannot speak them. Take what you want and leave the rest.


Listen to Fragmented to Whole:
Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

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Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery On:

Episode 107: The Importance of Boundaries in 12-Step Recovery: Learning from the Outside In

SHOW NOTES There are several means by which 12-step recovery programs impose boundaries on us. These include the Serenity Prayer, program slogans, several common meeting practices, as well as seven of the 12 Traditions. By having these healthy boundaries imposed from the outside first, we learn to form healthy boundaries of our from inside. The…

Episode 106: How to Overcome Victim Mentality Even If You’ve Been Victimized

SHOW NOTES People who have been victimized don’t necessarily take on the mentality of victimhood. That is, they’ve been through something, but they don’t always take on the identity of being a victim. Victims perceive themselves as not having choices. Victimization is about a situation; victimhood is an identity.  The way to overcome this mentality…

Episode 105: How to Turn Your Life Around: From Obstacles to Detours

SHOW NOTES The universe is FOR you, not against you. There is wisdom in the universe beyond your understanding. When things pop up that feel like they’re obstacles on your path, they’re really just detours. If you think back over your life you’ll see that to be true. Why wait to gain the perspective of…

Episode 104: How Fear and Telling the Truth Can Lead You to Wholeness

SHOW NOTES Hear my story of uncovering a fear that I could feel bubbling up like a pressure cooker. I managed that fear by telling the truth – and I didn’t die! (not kidding!). My pattern of dishonesty over the years reared it’s ugly head. Not giving into that fear and being honest about it…

Episode 103: How to Go from Black-and-White Thinking to Seeing the Gray

SHOW NOTES Most people in recovery have or have had lives filled with chaos on dysfunction. When we’re surrounded by chaos, we’re frequently “activated” as if on alert, which means it’s hard to think clearly. One of the ways our thinking gets distorted is that we see things only in stark contrast – like the…

Episode 102: Why Keeping the Focus on Yourself is the Antidote to Codependence

SHOW NOTES Codependence is a focus outside the self. This happens because when we’re in fight or flight mode, we’re not able to access the “human” part of our brain. That part of our brain is where our “self” is formed. Setting healthy boundaries is the best way to keep the focus on yourself to…

Episode 101: Why We Sabotage the Things We Want and How to Stop

SHOW NOTES Many of us have been sabotaging the things we want in our lives. This is often outside our awareness so we blame others for making this happen. I blamed untrustworthy people for being untrustworthy, when it was me who was trusting them! If this is a pattern of yours, this episode should help…

Episode 100: Voices, Music and Readings of Recovery

SHOW NOTES In celebration of the 100th episode of my podcast, I’ve invited a variety of people to share their voices, music and poetry. I also shared 3 of my most important (brief) recovery readings, and a story about how the desire to record a podcast was planted in me decades before podcasts even existed!…

Episode 99: How to Actually Understand the Difference Between Intention and Impact

SHOW NOTES To the outer world, impact is what matters. People don’t care if you have the best of intentions if your impact is bad. They also often done care if your intentions are bad but your impact is positive. But YOU should care, because your intentions impact YOU, regardless of the outcome in the…

Episode 98: My Two Most Important Questions for Guiding My Behavior

SHOW NOTES When I’m trying to decide if something is the right thing to do or whether something is healthy for me, I ask myself,  “Is this serving me?” and “What are my motives?“ These two question help me ensure that I’m living my life by my spiritual principles, and that I’m not manipulating others…

Episode 97: Living Life on Purpose – Turning Chaotic Situations into Non-Events

SHOW NOTES I share all the ways in which recovery has enabled me to end the drama and stress of my life and live with ease. Using the example of renewing my driver’s license, I lay out the series of ways in which I live on purpose (and you can too!!):  * putting money away for…

Episode 96: How to Get Over the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) by Keeping the Focus on Yourself

SHOW NOTES When we’re in fear of missing out, we’re focused on others, not on ourselves. It’s impossible to have a well-lived life when we’re not focused on ourselves. Yet we abandon ourselves by indulging in FOMO and comparing ourselves to others. This episode makes the case that keeping the focus on yourself is imperative…

What listeners are saying

"Barb, it's clear that you're speaking from your lived experience, and what you talk about is beyond the rooms of recovery. You actually operationalize recovery."

- C

"Barb. My goodness. I just finished your [One Day at a Time] podcast. It was incredible. Thank you....

So I've listened to your first podcast. I was connected to what you said especially how your life has changed.  PAUSE, which I've learned about and love. And flawsome. Amen...Thanks so much. You give hope. It was powerful...

Just listened to #2 Acceptance. Gonna have to listen again. It was powerful. What really comes across is your sincerity. Thanks."

- K

"Hey! Finally started listening  to your podcast. It’s really good.  I listen to over 1000 podcast probably in the past two years. Your shit is official. You’re totally Flawsome.  You’re like a dynamic special ops recovery person. You're totally sensitive and have the [anonymous program]  active listening and true compassion characteristics. Combined with a little bit of adorable cheesiness (e.g. Flawsome). But then also like a tough guy old timer that’s gruff and doesn’t take shit from people."

- J

"I'm a minute and 22 seconds into your episode on Acceptance... I still have these [negative] thoughts...The solution: growth mindset and surrounding myself with this kind of information...thank you for doing this, definitely helps motivate me..."

- E

"Your podcast was a delight to listen to. Authenticity, sincerity starts within and re-parenting oneself with gentleness, humor, love and respect are the tools that fuels the process."

- A

"Full of useful, helpful guidance!!!! So, I say thank you for your efforts! It was not preachy at all - and I guard against 'preachiness.' ...Thank you for your efforts Barb."

- A.C

"I play [your podcasts] for people when I give them rides home from meetings. They find them awesome as I do...I am hoping to begin using your podcasts in groups at work - short enough to hold people's attention and wonderful topics that all can benefit from as we try to bring healing and freedom from suffering into the are a delight and a noble soul. Thank you. Grateful for your commitment to help heal our planet."

- R

"If I had to describe it....I bathed in episodes 1-3 this morning and I feel much more prepared to engage in the tasks that will bring me success...thank you."

- V

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