Fragmented to Whole

Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

This podcast can help you go from fragmented to whole. The title of the podcast comes from my journey of recovery in 12 step programs where I came in feeling fragmented and now I AM WHOLE. I talk about how that happened, and many of the lessons I've learned in recovery. I cover such topics as learning acceptance, overcoming unrealistic expectations, intimacy, forgiveness and boundaries.

All episodes are 20 minutes or less, most are less than 15. The first episode is my story in brief so you'll hear about the kind of profound life changes that I experienced in 12-step recovery. Other episodes cover specific topics such as Acceptance, Victim Mentality, Overcoming Negative Thought Loops, etc. You don't have to be in recovery to benefit from it though!

One last (very important) thing. I don't speak for or endorse any particular 12 step program of recovery. Though I'm a huge fan of 12 step recovery, and a member of two 12 step fellowships, I cannot speak them. Take what you want and leave the rest.


Listen to Fragmented to Whole:
Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

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Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery On:

Episode 102: Why Keeping the Focus on Yourself is the Antidote to Codependence

SHOW NOTES Codependence is a focus outside the self. This happens because when we’re in fight or flight mode, we’re not able to access the “human” part of our brain. That part of our brain is where our “self” is formed. Setting healthy boundaries is the best way to keep the focus on yourself to…

Episode 101: Why We Sabotage the Things We Want and How to Stop

SHOW NOTES Many of us have been sabotaging the things we want in our lives. This is often outside our awareness so we blame others for making this happen. I blamed untrustworthy people for being untrustworthy, when it was me who was trusting them! If this is a pattern of yours, this episode should help…

Episode 100: Voices, Music and Readings of Recovery

SHOW NOTES In celebration of the 100th episode of my podcast, I’ve invited a variety of people to share their voices, music and poetry. I also shared 3 of my most important (brief) recovery readings, and a story about how the desire to record a podcast was planted in me decades before podcasts even existed!…

Episode 99: How to Actually Understand the Difference Between Intention and Impact

SHOW NOTES To the outer world, impact is what matters. People don’t care if you have the best of intentions if your impact is bad. They also often done care if your intentions are bad but your impact is positive. But YOU should care, because your intentions impact YOU, regardless of the outcome in the…

Episode 98: My Two Most Important Questions for Guiding My Behavior

SHOW NOTES When I’m trying to decide if something is the right thing to do or whether something is healthy for me, I ask myself,  “Is this serving me?” and “What are my motives?“ These two question help me ensure that I’m living my life by my spiritual principles, and that I’m not manipulating others…

Episode 97: Living Life on Purpose – Turning Chaotic Situations into Non-Events

SHOW NOTES I share all the ways in which recovery has enabled me to end the drama and stress of my life and live with ease. Using the example of renewing my driver’s license, I lay out the series of ways in which I live on purpose (and you can too!!):  * putting money away for…

Episode 96: How to Get Over the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) by Keeping the Focus on Yourself

SHOW NOTES When we’re in fear of missing out, we’re focused on others, not on ourselves. It’s impossible to have a well-lived life when we’re not focused on ourselves. Yet we abandon ourselves by indulging in FOMO and comparing ourselves to others. This episode makes the case that keeping the focus on yourself is imperative…

Episode 95: How to Understand the Relationship Between Honesty and Trust

SHOW NOTES If you’re anything like I was before recovery, you were (or maybe still are) unable to be honest much of time. Some of that dishonesty has to do with not trusting others. If you grew up in a chaotic or unsafe environment, that makes sense. Lying was self protective. However, now that we’re…

Episode 94: How to Strengthen Your Boundaries by Letting Go

SHOW NOTES It’s a paradox that the more we let go, the stronger our boundaries become. This is because controlling others is impossible, but controlling ourselves is not. When we are focused on others and situations out of our control, we become fixated on our desired outcome and have no choices. When we let go,…

Bonus #3: What to Do When You’re Triggered

SHOW NOTES Breathing deeply and engaging your senses are the best way to get into the present moment when you’re triggered. When you do that, you’re fully in your body in the here and now. You’re not in the past when you were little or when that traumatic thing happened. I walk you through two…

93: How to Overcome Your Sense of Urgency So You Can Relax

SHOW NOTES Living with a sense of urgency 24/7 is not something everyone feels. If you feel a sense of urgency at all times, like I did before recovery, I want you to know that it’s possible to stop living like that. Living with a sense of urgency all the time may be an indicator…

92: Two Kinds of Discomfort

SHOW NOTES In this episode I make the distinction between things that are uncomfortable that we’ve learned to put up with, especially if we grew up in chaos – and things that are uncomfortable because they’re new. I called this “bad” discomfort and “good” discomfort. The way to know which is which is to ask…

What listeners are saying

"Barb, it's clear that you're speaking from your lived experience, and what you talk about is beyond the rooms of recovery. You actually operationalize recovery."

- C

"Barb. My goodness. I just finished your [One Day at a Time] podcast. It was incredible. Thank you....

So I've listened to your first podcast. I was connected to what you said especially how your life has changed.  PAUSE, which I've learned about and love. And flawsome. Amen...Thanks so much. You give hope. It was powerful...

Just listened to #2 Acceptance. Gonna have to listen again. It was powerful. What really comes across is your sincerity. Thanks."

- K

"Hey! Finally started listening  to your podcast. It’s really good.  I listen to over 1000 podcast probably in the past two years. Your shit is official. You’re totally Flawsome.  You’re like a dynamic special ops recovery person. You're totally sensitive and have the [anonymous program]  active listening and true compassion characteristics. Combined with a little bit of adorable cheesiness (e.g. Flawsome). But then also like a tough guy old timer that’s gruff and doesn’t take shit from people."

- J

"I'm a minute and 22 seconds into your episode on Acceptance... I still have these [negative] thoughts...The solution: growth mindset and surrounding myself with this kind of information...thank you for doing this, definitely helps motivate me..."

- E

"Your podcast was a delight to listen to. Authenticity, sincerity starts within and re-parenting oneself with gentleness, humor, love and respect are the tools that fuels the process."

- A

"Full of useful, helpful guidance!!!! So, I say thank you for your efforts! It was not preachy at all - and I guard against 'preachiness.' ...Thank you for your efforts Barb."

- A.C

"I play [your podcasts] for people when I give them rides home from meetings. They find them awesome as I do...I am hoping to begin using your podcasts in groups at work - short enough to hold people's attention and wonderful topics that all can benefit from as we try to bring healing and freedom from suffering into the are a delight and a noble soul. Thank you. Grateful for your commitment to help heal our planet."

- R

"If I had to describe it....I bathed in episodes 1-3 this morning and I feel much more prepared to engage in the tasks that will bring me success...thank you."

- V

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