Fragmented to Whole
Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery
This podcast can help you go from fragmented to whole. The title of the podcast comes from my journey of recovery in 12 step programs where I came in feeling fragmented and now I AM WHOLE. I talk about how that happened, and many of the lessons I've learned in recovery. I cover such topics as learning acceptance, overcoming unrealistic expectations, intimacy, forgiveness and boundaries.
Most episodes are 20 minutes or less. The first episode is my story in brief so you'll hear about the kind of profound life changes that I experienced in 12-step recovery. Other episodes cover specific topics such as Acceptance, Victim Mentality, Overcoming Negative Thought Loops, etc. You don't have to be in recovery to benefit from it though!
One last (very important) thing. I don't speak for or endorse any particular 12 step program of recovery. Though I'm a huge fan of 12 step recovery, and a member of two 12 step fellowships, I cannot speak them. Take what you want and leave the rest. Oh - and, I swear. A lot. If you don't like swearing, don't listen!
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Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery On:
84: Don’t Carpet the World
SHOW NOTES“It’s easier to put slippers on your feet than to carpet the world” is a Chinese proverb. The carpet metaphor is used in this episode to illustrate the issue of control. I talk about how we can learn to stop trying to control others (carpet the world) and work on controlling ourselves (put slippers…
83: Flawesome!
SHOW NOTES In this episode I talk about moving away from the black-and-white thinking that if we’re flawed, that means we’re not awesome. It’s perfectly normal to be flawed, and it’s ok to let others see your flaws. When you accept your own flaws, you’ll become more accepting of other people’s flaws too! If you…
82: You Don’t Have to Believe Your Thoughts!
SHOW NOTES You don’t have to believe the thoughts running through your head! This pertains to thoughts about yourself (like “I’m not enough”) as well as thoughts about others and the world. If you’re not choosing your thoughts *on purpose,* especially if they’re negative – think again! You don’t have to believe a thought just…
81: Something Came Up vs. Something Happened
SHOW NOTES When someone doesn’t show up when expected, we might be tempted to think, “something happened!” This usually has a negative connotation, like they were in an accident. However, when we think, “something came up” it’s neutral and not likely to send is into a tailspin of negativity and anxiety. You can purposely choose…
80: How to Enjoy the Holidays by Setting Boundaries Now
SHOW NOTES You don’t have to do things you don’t want to over the holidays! This includes attending events, exchanging gifts, spending money or having uncomfortable conversations. You’ll learn a variety of tips for setting boundaries for the holidays, including some specific scripts so use and scenarios in which to use them. I also recommend…
79: Terminal Uniqueness
SHOW NOTES Many of us come into recovery believing we’re “terminally unique” or that we’re “uniquely flawed.” What we learn is that we’re NOT terminally unique, and that there are many are many others like us. You are not alone, there are many others like you, and you DO belong. Here’s the link to my…
78: New Possibilities
SHOW NOTES The ability to believe in new possibilities is at the heart of our ability to change. Gaining a new perspective on our lives and our problems opens us up to new possibilities. The way we think about things is often the source of our difficulties, rather than the situations themselves. If you’d like…
77: Getting Rid of Expectations After the Fact
Show Notes Sometimes we don’t realize we even had an expectation until it wasn’t met. Whether that’s true for you, or you KNOW you had an expectation about something, you’ll learn how to “unhook” from those expectations even after the situation is over! This will melt your resentment about not having your expectation met. Please…
76: Reducing Emotional Pain
Show Notes This episode covers several ways to reduce your emotional pain. It covers how to take advantage of the power of your “thinking brain” to help you clean up your negative thinking; practicing self care and connecting with others. Please follow me on Instagram @HigherPowerCoaching, and check out my podcast website fragmentedtowhole.com. Be sure…
75: Becoming Entirely Ready to Change Your Life
If you’re sick and tired of your life and want to make changes, this episode will take you through a process to do that. Show Notes If you are truly committed to changing your ways, this episode is for you! The process of changing our lives is what 12 step recovery is all about. In…
74: Privacy vs. Secrecy
If you’re confused about the difference between what’s private and what’s secret, this episode will help clear that up. Show Notes In this episode, I clear up the distinction between what’s private and what’s secret. Private matters have to do with setting healthy boundaries. Secrets have to do with hiding our shame. I use the…
73: Understanding Natural Consequences
Natural consequences are the inevitable result of a person’s actions and I explain how enabling gets in the way of this. Show NotesThe natural consequences of negative behavior are typically negative. However, many people buffer, block or filter the consequences of other’s behavior by enabling them. Enabling is when we fix, solve, or make the…
What listeners are saying
"Barb, it's clear that you're speaking from your lived experience, and what you talk about is beyond the rooms of recovery. You actually operationalize recovery."
- C
"Your podcast was a delight to listen to. Authenticity, sincerity starts within and re-parenting oneself with gentleness, humor, love and respect are the tools that fuels the process."
- A
"Full of useful, helpful guidance!!!! So, I say thank you for your efforts! It was not preachy at all - and I guard against 'preachiness.' ...Thank you for your efforts Barb."
- A.C
"I play [your podcasts] for people when I give them rides home from meetings. They find them awesome as I do...I am hoping to begin using your podcasts in groups at work - short enough to hold people's attention and wonderful topics that all can benefit from as we try to bring healing and freedom from suffering into the world...you are a delight and a noble soul. Thank you. Grateful for your commitment to help heal our planet."
- R
"If I had to describe it....I bathed in episodes 1-3 this morning and I feel much more prepared to engage in the tasks that will bring me success...thank you."
- V
"You have opened doors in my mind that I did not know existed. Listening to you and your podcasts has made an enormous impact on my life, and now my outlook. You rock!" ~ A.
"Thank you, Barb! Listening to your podcast gave me hope that you could help me.
Framing everything through the lens of “boundaries” made sense to me. Something “clicked.” I realized many of my own struggles – maybe all of them – could be seen through the same lens. I also felt – after bingeing your podcasts – that I already knew you and that you were a straight shooter. You experienced many of the challenges that I was facing, and I greatly appreciated your willingness to share openly and honestly. And I was so encouraged to hear you talk about how much better your life is after starting your own recovery journey." ~ K
