Ep 164 – Why People Pleasing is Dishonest and Manipulative and How to Stop

When I first got into recovery, I remember saying that I was confused on where the line was between being helpful and being rescuing. I was asked what my intentions were behind my actions, and that’s how I realized that I was doing things because I was anxious about how people perceived me. Turns out, I was doing it because I was hoping others would think good things about me, and not because I was necessarily trying to be helpful without it being about me. I didn’t want to look bad. This week’s episode 164 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about understanding your own motives to stop being manipulative and a people pleaser! 

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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the importance of stopping your people pleasing behaviors and actionable steps you can take right now to stop the manipulation. 

Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:

  • How I discovered the difference between being helpful and being rescuing, and where the line is between these kind, helpful motivations and the negative, toxic traits.
  • How people pleasing is really just manipulation and dishonesty, and how this looks through the lens of intentions.
  • The varying degrees of people pleasing, and how it can manifest in different ways in different people.
  • How people pleasing is a learned behavior, and how you can unlearn this to live a more honest life.

What’s clear is that people pleasing is a sure sign of codependency; you’re putting the weight of the world on what others think of you more than what you think of you. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.


Ep 98. My two most important questions for guiding my behavior





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What is Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery?

This is the podcast “Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery.” It will help people who want to heal to move from fragmented to whole.

Hi, I’m Barb! I share my experience, strength and hope from 12 step recovery in each episode. They’re all 20 minutes or less. Unlike most recovery podcasts where you hear a person’s whole story, in this one each episode is about a specific topic.

There are many life lessons from 12 step recovery that are applicable to those in and outside of recovery. This podcast brings some of those lessons to the airwaves, including such topics as learning acceptance, recognizing and overcoming victim mentality and establishing healthy boundaries.

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