Newsletter
Why Difficult Conversations Feel So Hard and How to Feel Safe While Having Them
Issue 173, June 26, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ One of the most important things I’ve learned in recovery is how to have difficult conversations. For most of my life, I avoided them whenever possible. If something was bothering me, I would think about it endlessly. I’d replay conversations in my head,…
20 Years Ago Today My Brother Pat Died
June 20, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ 20 years ago today, my brother Pat died. He was 35. He was my “little brother“ (even though he was much taller and bigger than me). He died of Legionaire’s Disease, which only about 5% of people who get it do. He was severely debilitated…
How to Stay Connected When Someone Gets Your Intentions Wrong
Issue 172, June 19, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ Have you ever had someone say something about you that felt was completely untrue? Maybe they told you that you’re selfish or inconsiderate, or they said you don’t care about them. Whatever the accusation, before you even had time to think, you found…
Why Staying in Your Own Lane Is One of the Most Loving Things You Can Do
Issue 171, June 12, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ One of the most important things I learned about boundaries came from recovery meetings. And honestly, when I first encountered it, I hated it. It’s called the “no cross-talk” rule. When someone shares during a meeting, you don’t interrupt them. You don’t comment…
How to Create Safer Relationships Using the Rules of the Road
Issue 170, June 5, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ How to Create Safer Relationships Using the Rules of the Road One day, I was driving home from my sweetheart’s house when I found myself getting irritated at a familiar sight. There’s a particular intersection where people frequently turn left on red. It’s…
How to Practice Self-Care Without Feeling Selfish
Issue 169, May 29, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ One of the biggest misconceptions people have about self-care is that it’s mostly about adding things to your life: bubble baths, massages, vacations, pedicures, yoga classes, meditation apps. And while there’s absolutely nothing wrong with any of those things, most people don’t actually…
Why Self-Care Isn’t Always Healthy
Issue 168, May 22, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ Not everything that looks like self-care actually nourishes you. Sometimes what we call “self-care” is actually avoidance. Sometimes what looks like rest is shutdown. And sometimes what feels like helping is really self-abandonment in disguise. And that’s why I think one of the…
How Do I Stop Over-Giving Without Being Selfish?
May 20, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ One of the biggest fears people have when they begin setting boundaries is this: “What if I become selfish?” They worry that if they stop over-giving, over-functioning, people-pleasing, and putting everyone else first, they’ll somehow become cold, uncaring, or self-centered. But in my experience, selfishness…
Why Fighting Your Feelings Is Exhausting You and How to Stop
Issue 167, May 15, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ There’s a phrase I heard years ago by the Buddhist teacher Cheri Huber that completely changed the way I relate to emotions: “You are responsible for your feelings, not for your feelings.” At the time, I understood it intellectually. But I don’t think…
How Do I Get Over the Guilt I Feel When Setting Boundaries?
May 13, 2026 ✨ Higher Power Coaching & Consulting ✨ photo credit: Diego Martz Most people think the goal is to stop feeling guilty when they set boundaries. But that’s not actually the goal. The real goal is learning how to stay with yourself when guilt shows up. That’s a very different thing. One of…